ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
