Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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