is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize
