They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
