I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Rumble strips road head = magical
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
