Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
