Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
