yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
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