so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
