yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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