More tranny stories later!
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
