I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
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