bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize