i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Randomize
