Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
