i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
ttyl tear gas
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize