omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
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