Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Randomize
