so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
