Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
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