I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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