Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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