Nicole vs. Life
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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