we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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