i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
