I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
