Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
