People with herpes should wear stickers.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize