He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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