There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
