I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
