Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Still dying that you shit outside
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Sorry about my life...
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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