I think I am morally bankrupt
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
