We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
it's like iHOP with fire
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
