we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
id be glad to
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
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