I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
