Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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