I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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