You can't motorboat a personality
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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