Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I wish I only lived at night.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Randomize
