I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize