I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
