I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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