I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
