I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Randomize
