Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
