On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
