I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
