You're my little dorito
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
