make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
