He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
two words: eviction party
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
you're hired as official boob wrangler
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
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