i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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