You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I need to sanitize my soul.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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